Weddings and rings are bound together in our culture. With my own wedding coming up quickly, I’ve given a lot of thought to jewelry and its value lately. Some jewelry is precious simply because of the sentimental attachment we have to it. From macaroni necklaces presented proudly by your three-year old niece to antique pieces made of cheap metal and glass “stones,” these pieces are precious for the thought put into making them or because they were once owned and worn often by your grandma.
Fine jewelry that has inherent value from its component materials such as precious metals and precious stones obviously has more monetary value. The rarity of these resources make them precious and somehow more desirable. I think engagement rings are the perfect example of jewelry that is precious both sentimentally and monetarily.
Do you think the monetary value of a piece makes it more precious or simply more desirable as a status symbol? For my own engagement ring, I selected a garnet as the central stone. Garnets are my birthstone and I love the color red. For both these reasons, a garnet had more sentimental value to me than a diamond. Diamonds are beautiful but are they truly worth all the mystique we attribute to them? My intended is from South Africa, one of the world’s largest producers of exquisite diamonds; I am from Arkansas, the Diamond state. It seems to me the value of diamonds and their dominance as THE stone for engagement rings is rather arbitrary. What is your opinion on the value of jewelry and diamonds? Does a more expensive price automatically mean a more precious piece? Do you believe a diamond is forever as the ad says and think it the best symbol of love? What do you think?
Love that ring, but I like the old vintage look in jewelry. I guess alot of things, beings I have quite a few of antiques.
I love antiques and vintage inspired things as well! Thank you for sharing your opinion JoAnn! 🙂
I knew from the time I was a girl that I wanted a sapphire as my engagement ring. (It’s also my birthstone.) Did you ever read the Anne of Green Gables books? Anne pictures a diamond as a warm, beautiful stone and is so disappointed when she finally sees one and realizes it’s cold and hard.
My engagement ring is an emerald cut sapphire flanked by smaller triangular diamonds, all set in platinum. It’s just what I wanted. It’s “me” in a way that large diamonds are most definitely not. Funny, I now wear a diamond wedding band on my right ring finger. It’s not my style at all, but it was my mother’s (I inherited it). So I wear it. I think that answers both your questions. 🙂
Tiffany is advertising that they started the tradition of the diamond engagement ring which somehow does not surprise me. I work in the jewelry business and I handle diamond jewelry every day. I would much rather see and own one unique piece with colored stones than a whole pile of diamonds. Mom gave me her original engagement ring as she had the center diamond set in a smaller ring. I had it re-set with a blue sapphire, her birthstone and it was my 35th birthday present to myself. I love it. I say go for vintage and antique because they have stories to tell.
I missed the Anne of Green Gables series but I think the disappointment expressed by Anne’s character mirrors my own. Your ring sounds beautiful! Thank you for sharing your opinion.
Just remember that diamonds are often referred to as “ice”. Not the feeling that you want in a relationship. I prefer opals. They have fire and are fragile,a perfect metaphor.
pam
What a lovely birthday present! I really like that is has sentimental value from your Mom and your own personal touch as well. I appreciate your opinion, Angela. Thanks for sharing. 🙂
I agree, that is a great metaphor! My Mom’s name is Opal so they have special meaning to me. I really wanted to have the garnet flanked by opals but it would have been a very expensive custom made ring.
My most precious “jewels” are inexpensive and totally sentimental. Top of my list is a little necklace, made by my mother, of crocheted gold thread and tiny bluegreen beads. Perhaps if I were in the economic stratum where “investment jewelry” made sense, I’d have some. No, wait…then I wouldn’t wear it for fear of being mugged.
I live in Johannesburg, the City of gold in South Africa. An hours drive from my home is the town where the largest diamond in the world was discovered. I collect jewelery (but hardly ever wear it). My favourite ring is hand crafted silver with what could be a garnet. Made in Zimbabwe this ring reminds me of precious feelings of freedom and safety I felt as a child with my Gran in Zimbabwe. I feel all relationships like humans are unique so should the jewelery we choose be unique to our choices and emotions.
I think diamonds are a rip off and if you go to sell a $10,000 ring you would be lucky to get $5,000 or less for it. I do not see jewelry as a good investment at all. I think your Garnet is a perfect alterative to a diamond. I had 2-1 carat diamond rings that I never wore because I am not fond of any type of rings. I gave one to my son and the other to my daughter when she was getting engaged and for a couple of hundred dollars her hubby to be had it made into a ring she loves. I like the stainless rings that the guys prefer for their wedding bands. I have very good finger nails and long fingers and once when I was engaged and wearing my diamond a friends of mine asked a somewhat older lady to look at my stunning ring and she said “anyone can buy a ring but not everyone can have nails like hers” LOL So my answer is a ring is a ring and money does not by beauty or create love and a good marriage. Bless you and yours on your coming marriage and much happiness to you.
I love gem stones in general, and diamonds happen to be my favorite. I don’t think that price should be any bearing on how much the piece means to an individual. My wedding set did not cost an arm and a leg as many do, but I treasure it and to me it is perfect and beautiful. I love the ring you have pictured, and I think that it is perfect for you to choose what means something to you. Who says we have to fit the mold? It should not be about how many carats you got, or how much it cost, or clarity and cut. The ring is a symbol of your love and devotion:) Congrats!
Hi,
We’re thinking about getting married too and I really don’t want an expensive ring. I hope to find a nice old one, whether it’s with a precious stone or not, I really don’t care. I really hope to find one by ‘accident’ in a thrift shop or a garage sale or something and just fall in love with it!
I own a couple of rings that belonged to my grandmother (she’s now in a retirement home) and they are real silver (which I prefer over gold) and have glass or even synthetic ‘stones’. I really live them and wear them often?
I wish you lots of happiness in your relationship
My wedding ring is a .5 carat sapphire set in a 1930’s silver ring with tiny diamond points for sparkle and I think it is the most beautiful ring I have ever seen. The ring is kind of on the big side for a wedding ring and is much “more” ring than any of my friends have because we weren’t paying for a diamond or platinum. We also chose sapphire because it is my birthstone, we met in September and our daughter, who was 9 months old when we were married 2 years ago was born in September also. I think this ring means a whole lot more to me than a diamond in platinum or even gold would have!
I agree – it is arbitrary. Monetarily any item is only worth as much as someone is willing to pay for it. Sentimental is the best way to go!
I think that whatever holds the most sentiment is the most valuable. My rings are diamonds, but they look like the rings of a beloved Grandmother– that’s why we went with the diamonds…its all where the heart is– our love and our sentiment.
My engagement ring was a pearl surrounded by rubies. The pearl is my birthstone, the rubies are his, so it was very sentimental to me. It was thousands less than a diamond of the same size would have cost, but meant so much more than any diamond would have. Even though we have been divorced for many years now, the ring is still one of my favorites. For me, I’d take the personal value over the monetary value (jewelry or anything else)every time.
My something borrowed was my grandmother’s wedding set which I borrowed from my aunt. In addition to my wedding set, which my husband excitedly designed despite not caring much for jewelry. So I love my diamond engagement ring despite the fact that saphires are my favorite stone, and was almost more concerned about losing my grandmother’s ring because of the sentimental value. So, I would say it depends on the couple as to what is most important, because the day should be about celebrating them, their style and the joining of their families.
(^: Oh, and hope your day is as beautiful as your ring…
Sure, the jewelry industry will tell you that an expensive ring means he loves you more (at least that was my fiance’s experience!), but his choosing a ring you will be delighted to wear, regardless of what sort of ring it is, is a far better expression of love than mindlessly hewing to what the wedding-industrial complex tells him he should do. I have a diamond (which I love because it goes with everything… and not having to worry about scratching it is nice too!) but that doesn’t make it “better.” And yes, the diamond engagement ring is basically a big conspiracy by De Beers.
I feeling guilty for loving my diamond engagement ring;o). I love diamonds. The only I specified was that it be a Canadian diamond. And to have my husband pick it out. I would hate to have selected my own ring. I wanted the knowledge that he picked it out all by himself. He did a great job too!
It was all started by deBeers, engagement rings weren’t really worn at all until early 1900. Diamonds aren’t any more precious or rare than other stones, just better marketed. Given the ethical issues, not just blood diamonds but the working conditions in non western mines where there are high levels of asbestosis and silicosis caused by the kimberlite that diamonds bed in, combined with inadequate safety and dust suppression, I don’t favour them. if you want sparkle then cz has a higher refractive index, and so many other stones have beautiful hues that make diamonds look boring, expensive and over hyped!
I’ve been thinking of a fire opal as the main stone in my eventual engagement ring, I’m glad I’m not alone in it! I like the look of a diamond, but I don’t think it is worth the thousands of dollars to me or my man.
When we were getting engaged my husband searched antique stores for a ring but could’t find one. He found a beautiful ring in a jewelry store that has a very vintage feeling. Because we both had just finished graduate school the diamond is very small (1/4 carrat.) He struggles to understand why I don’t want to replace it with a larger stone, but for me it is the ring that is important, not the size or price.
I have to say that diamonds are pretty but they r the secondary stones for my engagement ring. My fav color since I was born is pink and I was determined to have a pink stone for my engagement ring. I ended up with a beautiful pink saphire cushion cut that is very reminiscent of the art deco period. The monetary value of the ring doesn’t mean anything to me. We did go for platinum but only because gold sometimes turns my fingers black and I did not want that on my ring finger. I have always been drawn to the rings that are “different.” Your’s is beautiful and enjoy your wedding and married life!
I’ve been with my husband since I was 14 years old. We broke up after high school for a few years and got back together in 1989. We were young, in our early twenties, and didn’t make a lot of money. We went to Service Merchandise and spent $198 on a cubic zirconia ring. It meant the world to me. We finally got married in 1992 in a court house by the Justice of the Peace. My husband didn’t even have a wedding band. Fast forward to 2006. Living in Vegas, making lots of money, we went to Zales and chose a 3 carat diamond wedding ring (band and engagement ring combo). It was beautiful. Fast forward again to 2011. Living back home in WI for several years, financial hardship, husband loses job, 4 kids to feed, etc. I had to pawn that big ring to pay my mortgage. But you know what? I didn’t really care. I took a huge monetary loss, but I still have that cubic zirconia ring that means the world to me. I wouldn’t get rid of that for anything in the world. That ring was given to me out of pure love and I will be buried with it. Of course, first I’ll have to get it sized since it doesn’t fit on my finger anymore haha! At any rate, I think diamonds are overrated. They are gorgeous for sure, but a wedding is about the love that you have together. I think your sentiments about your ring are just as beautiful as the ring itself. Kudos to you for daring to be different. 🙂
Your wedding, your rules. But I think you’ll enjoy reading this Wikipedia entry about how diamonds became the “traditional” engagement ring. I heard this story from a different source too. It started as recently as the 1930’s and it’s all about marketing. What isn’t?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Engagement_ring
I wanted a sapphire instead of a diamond but I caved to what society said I should have in my ring. 15 years later the diamond fell out never to be found. One of these days I will be replacing it with the sapphire I really wanted. Your ring in the photo is lovely and personally I would pick it over some fancy schmancy diamond any day!
I think you should opt for what your heart sings out for and I honestly think huge sums for engagement rings is plain silly these days. Many men lose their lives mining for gem stones to feed our lust for jewellery so why not re use older items? Yours is lovely looking, gracefully elegant.
I had a small gypsey setting of tiny diamonds for my own engagement ring – but only because I really wanted an old opal and saphire victorian ring in a gypsey setting and we simply couldnt find one back then.
My engagement ring outlived the marriage and lives in a box of regrets, so just as well it didnt cost us a huge sum of money!
I do like the look of the rarer coloured diamonds I adm, but even so, I feel lives are worth more than gemstones.
I also think the love which a ring is often a symbol of between two people, is far greater than any cost involved. Its a deeper meaning than material cost and a far greater importance than feeding Capitalism lol
When my husband and I got engaged, we selected a single ring for both the engagement and wedding ring. It had 5 stones, 3 sapphires and 2 diamonds. The center and largest stone was a beautiful sapphire. I love the color blue and absolutely loved that ring. After ten years of daily wear, sadly the sapphire became worn and rounded and fell out of my ring. My wonderful husband replaced it with a diamond and while I love the sparkly diamond, I loved the blue sapphire more. Diamonds are more durable than other gemstones, thus more suited to years and years of daily wear. I say go with what you love.
I have a diamond engagement ring and a band set with small diamonds. I love both. However, not that I also work in a very professional atmosphere (law) and the gold and diamond look goes with everything. I never have to worry if I will call unneeded attention to my hand by having something more “showy.”
I think the value of an engagement ring is in the monetary value— what amount is your fiance willing to spend? What can he spend? As with my husband, He picked out my ring. He knew what he could spend, but he also had the advice of his grandmother who said, “What ever you do, buy your wife to be a NICE ring, it may be the only nice thing you ever get her!” Because HE picked out my ring, yes a diamond, my ring means ALOT to me!!!!!!As for the stone itself, it’s ones own choosing! Some people are more traditional & some aren’t! Just get something you’ll be happy with! Monetary value & sentimental value are two different things!
I LOVE the ring pictured in your article. Where did it come from and can I buy one like it…not the gem stone, but the ring itself. Hope you can help!
Your ring is beautiful. I think you should get a ring that you love and that the kind of stone is not important. I personally wanted a diamond – mainly because it is my birth stone. Your ring will be special to you not because of its’ monetary value but because it represents your love.
I love your ring and think is absolutely beautiful. I, too, have an “unconventional” engagement ring, with a green tourmaline as the center stone. First, I didn’t want a typical ring and second, I was adamant that I had a piece that was estate or antique. I did not want to be the cause for more diamonds being mined. I say heck with what is considered by others as appropriate and go with a piece that makes you smile every time you look at it. That means more than any monetary tag. As for diamonds, they are not as precious or as rare as we are led to believe. This is, in fact, a marketing campaign designed by De Beers back in the early 1900’s to increase the sale of diamonds.
Thank you all for the well wishes for our upcoming marriage! I appreciate it.
My ring has 3 Tanzanite stones with small diamond chips along the sides and I found a matching band of slightly larger chips. EVERYone comments about my ring. Nothing is “precious” if YOU don’t feel that way about the item. As it turns out, my tanzanite will actually be the better investment because it comes from a finite source. Once the mine is emptied, that’s it!
Well said! 🙂
The first time I was married, we used $3 hematite rings for the first several years, and then switched to sterling silver rings and they were precious to me. (Until he was no longer precious in my life.)
A year ago, I married a man that I had dated/lived with for over 9 years. He asked me if it would offend me to purchase my ring at a pawn shop that a friend owned. I guess that is one reason we get along well–I am practical. He bought a beautiful ring for much less than it would have been at the jewelry store. Because he is practical and thrifty, he was able to buy us a 4000 square ft house on 75 acres with a huge shop instead. The fact that we were married and had a nice place to live means much more to me than a piece of jewelry.
I loved sapphires from when I was a small child. Even though my birthstone was amethyst, I chose a sapphire for my class ring. When I got married, I chose sapphires and diamonds. I loved the ring, but the marriage ended very badly. I no longer want sapphires in any of my jewelry because of this. (my aversion makes me rather sad, as my father’s birthstone was sapphire)
I do however, like very wide rings. I like the way they look. For my marriage I am in now, I didn’t need a big wedding or an expensive ring. All I needed was my husband, who I am so lucky and blessed to have. I chose a lovely wide sterling silver ring from Etsy, stamped with a floral design and joined with a tiny gold band around the center of the wide band. I love it, and it means more to me than any diamond that cost thousands of dollars.
personally i would hope any man who is thinking of asking a lady to marry him, and that lady is overly concerned about the cost of the ring… that man should run! lol, serioously though. 100 years back folks did not worry about the cost of a ring and were married far longer than most couples nowadays. Hubby and i will celebrate our 20th this fall. My first ring was a simple ring with a few small diamonds for the cost of 600. About ten years ago a new ring, with larger diamonds replaced the old ring which had broken for a cost of 400. If i had had my choice from the beginning i would have had bands made for us prob with no stones, but with an engraved design with some special meaning. Your ring will only mean something if you “feel” that meaning, no matter what the cost is. Good luck with your upcoming nuptuals!
I think the value should be measured by the heart. Doesn’t matter what it is made of, rather how it makes you feel inside in wearing the piece of jewelry…
Your setting is fabulous it looks vintage and I love the garnet! I have my mother-in-law’s diamond engagement ring but I don’t wear it because I am afraid I’ll lose it. I had an 18kt gold band she also gave me but I lost it and I’ve felt bad ever since so I don’t wear a ring anymore but 30 years later the love is still there! Wear and buy what you love!
Value holds no meaning to rings unless you are ‘that’ kind of person. Sentimental wins out each & every time. In fact, I don’t even have an engagement ring, we were together for 14 years before we decided to actually get married, 1 year on & I still don’t have an engagement ring nor do I want one. My wedding band is a simple white gold band with no ornament, the band means something to me but my hubby chose not to wear a band as they have no meaning for him – which is fine by me.
your ring is beautiful! a ring needs to reflect the grooms ability totake care of his bride looks like you will always be taken care of:)
Congratulations to you! 🙂 Your ring is lovely, and the setting is unique.
I think diamonds are lovely, but I prefer them as an accent stone. I am an emerald girl myself…I like something with color.
From a practical standpoint, what does it matter what your ring is worth, financially? Unless you’re going to sell it, whether it’s worth $100 or 100K, it’s irrelevant (except for insurance purposed, I guess!)
What truly matters is it’s value to YOU. Diamonds or Zirconia, it’s the emotional value we place on the ring that dictates it’s “worth” to us in our hearts. Maybe our ring isn’t spectacular by current standards, but does it remind us how hard our intended worked to buy it for us? or maybe the happiness we felt when we were proposed to? That’s what matters, not its price tag.
Honestly, the whole Hollywood “20 karat ring” thing makes me a little sick to my stomach. When I think of what is spent on that type of jewelry, and how the money could have been spent instead…it seems senseless to me. Personally, I adore animals and if my fiance said “I spent $5K on your ring, and donated the other $95K to an animal shelter, I would love him 10 times more. 🙂
Very best of wishes for your future. May you receive an embarrassment of riches! 🙂
LoriAnn
I have a classic diamond solitaire that I love. It was almost exactly what I wanted– I like the classic traditionalism of it. BUT! Our first choice was to use a family ring. We begged and pleaded and talked to all the relatives on all sides of the family, and here just weren’t any rings that anyone was willing to part with, so my husband had to buy one.
I never wanted a diamond engagement ring- I wanted an vintage emerald or sapphire. SO I LOVE your ring! I think it all comes down to personal opinion. What you and hubby to be prefer and like. After all, you’re the one who will be wearing it! AND I can tell you that I have some GORGEOUS garnet stones that were mined out of Arkansas (grandpa is from Ark.), so I think it quite appropriate!
I say you should wear whatever you want to wear and not because it was dictated by jewelry manufacturers. The ring will be worn for many years to come and its important to wear what you like! I prefer Chrome Diopside to any stone out there, so beautiful! 🙂
Diamonds can be beautiful in themselves, as a gemological and geological wonder, but as jewelry their price is truly over-inflated. The market is controlled by DeBeers and they set the prices artificially high, not to mention the problem of diamonds used by terrorist groups. That said, I also prefer colored stones as being warmer and more “speaking” in jewelry. The setting, to me, also affects the beauty of the piece when it enhances the stone. You made a lovely choice that will become more sentimental to you over the years, but watch out for the high mounting as they can be a danger to hosiery!